Some Women’s Childhoods

Girl, Woman, Psychology, Abuse, Home

1 thing a woman may find, in regards to her relationships, is that she has the tendency to be drawn to men that are not very pleasant. As a result of this, she could struggle to understand what’s happening.

Due to the experiences she has had with a number of different men, she may believe that she’s a victim. There are then likely to be men out there who wish to cause her harm and there is going to be absolutely nothing that she can do about it.

Two Sides

On one side, then, there will be the sort of man that she wants to be with, and, on the flip side, there’ll be the sort of guys who ends up with. It may seem as if she has no control over this area of her life.

She might believe that the only way her life will change is if she gets lucky and can meet a man who is different. At the exact same time, she may find that she has met men who were distinct but not been drawn to them.


If this takes place, her life will almost certainly continue to go down the exact same path.

If, on the other hand, she was to consider this, she could find it tough to comprehend why this occurs. A guy will then treat her with respect, be dependable and consistent, amongst other things, but for some reason, she will have the need to break free from him.

A Strong Pull

What she’ll find is that a man who does not treat her well will be what’s a powerful effect on her. This is not to say that she will have positive thoughts running through her mind when she is with a guy like this; what it means is that although her mind will experience resistance, her body will react differently.

Said another way, her head can tell her to leave but her body can want her to remain. The inner conflict in her will then make it harder for her to cut her ties with a man like this, causing her to remain in a relationship that is not serving her.

The Experience

A man such as this could physically hurt her or he may verbally abuse her, which will make it hard for her to feel good about herself. She might not know where she stands with him or if he will walk away.

This may then be a relationship that lacks any kind of stability, consistency, love or esteem. A relationship like this will cause her to suffer, which could mean that just about every other area of her life could also fall apart.

Something Isn’t Perfect

They could even say that this is exactly what guys are like, with this probably being a sign that their friends are not in a good place either.

Walking away may get her out of a poisonous situation, yet unless something changes, she could end up in precisely the same situation before long.

Deep Down

In order for her to figure out why she has the tendency to end up with guys that are abusive and to stay well away from the individuals who aren’t, it will be essential for her to find to what’s taking place in her unconscious mind. If she was to concentrate only on her conscious mind, she’s unlikely to obtain the answers she needs.

This part of her can say that this is not what she wants and the resistance that she has to being with an abusive man is going to be seen as the proof. What she is very likely to find, if she goes deeper into her being, is that being with an abusive man is what feels safe.

A Different Agenda

During this time period, it is going to be important for her to not get too attached to what her mind comes out with; if this occurs, it will make it harder for her to truly connect with what is taking place at a deeper level. Her mind could struggle to understand why this would be what feels safe, and this will come down to the fact that the mind forgets what’s has forgotten – it is simply a defence mechanism.

The main reason why this is what feels safe can be due to what took place at during her early years. At this stage of her life, her father might not have treated her very well and there wouldn’t have been anything that she could do to protect herself.

Two Stages

What is familiar is classed as what’s secure to the subconscious mind.

So, as being treated in this manner is what feels safe, it’ll be normal for her to be drawn to a man who will allow her to re-experience what happened all those years back and to play out the same dramas. These experiences would have no doubt set her up to think that she was worthless, meaning that she will carry a reasonable amount of shame.


Another way of looking at this is to say that her unconscious mind is causing her to recreate her early experiences so that she can cure her pain and evolve. This is something that is called repetition compulsion.

The trouble is that unless she is aware of what is going on, she won’t be able to use the information that is being given to her and to gradually transform her life. What can happen is that she’ll become bitter and end up blaming all men.


If a woman can relate to this, and she wants to change this area of her life, she might want to reach out for external support. This is something which may be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

The sort of man that she’s drawn to will slowly change as her inner world changes. This is likely to be a time when she will be working though the injury that is being held in her body and mind.

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